Embrace Paradox: How To Navigate Tensions For Better Solutions in Life & Work

Wendy K. Smith (left) and Marianne W. Lewis (right), at a recent event for their latest book, Both/And Thinking: Embracing Creative Tensions to Solve Your Toughest Problems.

Both of them knew about each other’s work. And their collaboration was a perfect fit.  

Wendy Smith was a fan of her co-author, Marianne Lewis, and her research long before they met. Lewis was aware of the research Smith was working on as well; so their connection is the best example of their theory that life and work are not a collection of one or the other, clear-cut choices and either/or decisions.

“For @Profwendysmith and @MarianneWLewis, authors of their latest book, “Both/And Thinking: Embracing Creative Tensions to Solve Your Toughest Problems,” their collaboration was a perfect fit. #BothAndThinking”

It’s both.

“We both had studied innovation and product development and Marianne wrote in 2000 in the Academy of Management Review about how our field should pay more attention to paradox,” says Smith, Professor of Management and faculty director of the Women’s Leadership Initiative at the Lerner College of Business and Economics, University of Delaware.

“You see this idea in physics and psychoanalysis, but early in my PhD, I started seeing paradox as innovation and how to negotiate intention,” says Smith who earned her Ph.D. in organizational behavior at Harvard Business School in 2006, after receiving an M.A. in psychology at Harvard University in 2004 and an undergraduate degree from Yale University in political psychology in 1996.  

Lewis, dean and professor of management at the Carl H. Lindner College of Business University of Cincinnati, and former dean of the Cass Business School, City, University of London and a UK Fulbright Scholar, was aware of Smith’s research and sought her out.

 “I called her up and said, ‘Can we talk?’ That conversation was magical,” Lewis says. “I think it’s remarkable when likeminded people connect.”

The result of years of connection and thorough research is their new book, Both/And Thinking: Embracing Creative Tensions to Solve Your Toughest Problems, which highlights a particular and timely conundrum for women in business, leadership, entrepreneurship and everyday life. Their approach is a system for “individual decision, interpersonal conflict between groups and organization strategy to accommodate competing designs,” they write. The three core features of paradox are contradiction, interdependence and persistence.   

“@Profwendysmith and @MarianneWLewis ‘s new book, “Both/And Thinking: Embracing Creative Tensions to Solve Your Toughest Problems,” highlights a particular and timely conundrum for #women in business, #leadership, entrepreneurship and everyday life. ”

“Wendy and I started building this global network of scholars and it became this push to navigate tensions, and how to find comfort in discomfort,” says Lewis, who earned her MBA from the Kelley School of Business at Indiana University in 1997, PhD from the Gatton College of Business and Economics at the University of Kentucky in 1991, following a B.A. from Tusculum College in Business Administration in 1989.              

Paradox arrives in every moment of every day and was exacerbated by COVID, particularly for women.

“Three factors intensify your experience of paradox: change, scarcity and plurality, all with competing demands” says Lewis, who is among the world’s top 1% most-cited researchers in her field, according to Web of Science.

Dilemmas and tensions are necessary factors in life and work, and can be reframed and embraced, says Lewis, particularly now, as “COVID is the perfect storm. When the boundaries of work and life disintegrated, it was the worst of both worlds.”

“Dilemmas and tensions are necessary factors in life and work, and can be reframed and embraced, says @MarianneWLewis, particularly now as “#COVID is the perfect storm. When the boundaries of work and life disintegrated, it was the worst of both worlds.” #worklifebalance ”

Read more from Gloria Feldt on COVID challenges

The challenges of the current post-pandemic workplace can present mental health concerns for workers, as the World Health Organization recently reported, “An estimated 15% of working-age adults have a mental disorder at any point in time.”

In the recent second annual global survey of Women at Work, Deloitte finds from the the responses of 5,000 women in 10 countries that “the pandemic continues to take a heavy toll on women: burnout, for one, has reached alarmingly high levels. At the same time, women have made career and life decisions…seeking new, more flexible working patterns; for others it has meant leaving their employer or the workforce entirely.”

More alarming results from the study include that 53% of those surveyed report their stress levels are higher than a year ago, with 56% saying they have poor job satisfaction and 38% saying they have poor work/life balance.

“More alarming results from @Deloitte ‘s annual global #WomenAtWork study include that 53% of those surveyed report their #stress levels are higher than a year ago, with 56% saying they have poor job satisfaction and 38% saying they have poor #worklifebalance. ”

Only 36% of those surveyed report that in a hybrid workforce, they have clear expectations around where and how they work. And a key result on the impact of choice on whether to report or not report harassment or microaggressions, 93% say they believe their employer will not take action on harassment and 93% say reporting harassment will harm their careers.

This is as Harvard Business Review recently reports that talking about burnout at work is still taboo. “Before organizations can address burnout, however, they need to create the necessary conditions to discuss it. Too often, burnout carries a stigma of individual weakness, that someone “can’t hack it,” which makes people reluctant to be honest about it. So team leaders must provide psychological safety, or a culture where people feel secure enough to take risks and share problems without fear of punishment. “

Read more in Take The Lead on work/life tensions

Burnout is a key driver in perhaps choosing a both/and approach, Lewis says. Asking yourself, “In a perfect world, what is the strength? What is the best thing I can do at home? What is the best thing about office work?” She explains, then asks, “What is the danger? If you think about the highest value you realize the interdependence.”  

Smith says that workplace and life decisions such as these can be dissected into two components. First, “Do we see and experience tensions? Do we experience tensions and are we open to them or do we take an either/or a both/and approach to tensions?”

According to Smith, “Some unique tensions women face as leaders are navigating competence, compassion, likeability and skills. The more competent they are, the less likeable they are.”

“According to @Profwendysmith, “Some unique tensions #women face as #leaders are navigating competence, compassion, likeability and skills. The more competent they are, the less likeable they are.” #genderbias”

Seeing solutions as not a dichotomy but as an inclusive process can present new opportunities. “The embrace of both/and is when people see possibilities. How we engage with these tensions can lead to virtuous, positive experiences,” Smith says. The goal is “to give people the tools to drive toward the possibilities.”

Read more at Take The Lead on avoiding tensions at work

The habit of expressing life as a collection of distinct choices of one or the other is “the default in culture where either/or feels like a sense of control. But it’s a defense mechanism,” Lewis says.

“The habit of expressing life as a collection of distinct choices of one or the other is “the default in culture where either/or feels like a sense of control. But it’s a defense mechanism,” @MarianneWLewis says. #mindset #leadership”

“The first step is to change the question,” Smith says. “Engaging with the paradox is messy and uncomfortable, but it’s a lifelong pursuit. It’s a practice, a commitment over time, to shift the mindset and ask the question of how can we accommodate A & B. ”  

In their book, the authors write that there are four types of paradoxes. Performing paradoxes are tensions of outcomes, braced around the question of why. Belonging Paradoxes address the tensions of identity, or who are the players or stakeholders. Learning paradoxes center on tensions of time, or answering the question of when, including short term or long-term effects. Organizing Paradoxes are about the tensions of processes, or how a tension will be solved.

Because these tensions are ongoing, Lewis suggests, “The earlier you start practicing both/and thinking, the more you learn. Then you don’t feel paralyzed.”

A new study, Bank of America 2022 Women & Minority Business Owner Spotlight, highlights the duality of women in business today, with many expressing both positive and negative views. However, women have an overall positive business outlook, and 71% are feeling equipped to weather  For instance, 47% of women small business owners plan to expand their business over the next year, while 59% of women business owners say they have to work harder for same success as men. Another 29% of women business owners say they don’t think women will ever have equal access to capital.

The present and the future present anomalies that require both/and thinking.

“Ignoring paradoxes will only cause them to come back stronger,” the authors write. “A better approach, we think, is to effectively engage them.”

““Ignoring paradoxes will only cause them to come back stronger,” @MarianneWLewis and @Profwendysmith write. “A better approach, we think, is to effectively engage them.” #problemsolving #leadership”

Early in her career, Smith says, “I got stuck in my own decision to be an academic or a practitioner who implements ideas, until I realized I could be able to study and implement ideas.”

Lewis says writing this book was an amazing experience. “We are trying to practice what we profess. It’s really powerful to have bold discussions about excellence and access.”

Read more in Take The Lead on your risk profile and approach to tensions

Smith agrees. “We face a world with so many profound challenges; we need better solutions. We have shifted from doulas to evangelists about how these ideas can shape solutions.”